The Whirlwind Of Change
So I'm kinda flipping out right now and I'm not sure I completely understand why. We had a meeting tonight after the evening service with more concrete details and the coming changes to the church and I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed right now. I'm feeling depressed enough that I actually turned down an opportunity to hang out with Lesley, Val, and a few other friends after it was all over. I just knew I needed to be alone to try to somehow digest this whole thing. Normally I'd just put on a movie or start playing a computer game so I can ignore the turmoil in my head. But I'll try putting my thoughts down instead and see how it goes.
So the church has decided to move to two services in the morning and cancel the evening service (a sore point for me since the evening service was very important to me). The idea is to have two morning services with different styles. The first service should be more like the evening service - quieter with less of the flash of the current service. The current service which will stay the same but move a little later in the morning. As part of this change they are creating three new worship teams and tonight's meeting was to officially announce the teams.
Each team with be made up of two units (for lack of a better word) - a band unit and a vocal unit of somewhere between 6 and 9 singers. They want each unit to be somewhat independent of each other to allow to people or entire units to sub for members who can't make a particular Sunday. One of the repercussions of this is all teams will have to have the same core songs and play them the same way. At this point in time it leaves a number of unanswered questions. Who decides the standard arrangement? How much room (if any at all) will there be for creative freedom? Are non-standard songs allowed to be developed by a team and kept specific to that team?
Those questions we've been wondering about since that big Tuesday night meeting. But now that the groups have been announced there are even more unanswered questions. I am the music leader for one of the teams, and I'm pretty happy on who I've been assigned on my team. There are a few that I don't know at all so I have no idea where they are at when it comes to leading worship. My band will pretty much stay the same so I'm pleased about that. Vocally it will be nice having Lesley and her mother, Julie, on my team. But now that my team has suddenly jumped from five people to twelve I'm definitely feeling overwhelmed. At the end of the meeting practice nights were decided upon based on the people that were there. For my vocalists, Thursday night is the best night for them to practice, but I know for a fact that Ian by bass player can't make it on Thursdays. And well I really don't know what my drummer's schedule is like since he's new to my team as well, but I know this morning he said he preferred Tuesday. So now I'm feeling pulled between the two units because I'm not sure if my band will be able to practice with my vocalists. Since I've been involved in worship at All Nations, having committed band members has been an issue. Filling the bass player spot has always been the hardest for some reason. It's barely been a month since my previous bass player left. The prospect of losing another one is not something I'm looking forward to.
So yeah.... why am I so upset about all this? After years with No Idols and being under Ron's leadership I finally had a band of my own. We were nice and independent and could do whatever songs we wanted in whatever style we wanted. Now it feels like I'm expected to fit into this mold and my first instinct is to resist it and to fight it. When I first signed up to help out with worship two summers ago at this church I made a conscious decision to start small because everything All Nations does is big. And at this very moment "Lord You Have My Heart" by Delirious? just popped up on my play list - a very "small", but incredibly powerful song. Talk about a way to underscore how I feel right now.
Matthew.
So the church has decided to move to two services in the morning and cancel the evening service (a sore point for me since the evening service was very important to me). The idea is to have two morning services with different styles. The first service should be more like the evening service - quieter with less of the flash of the current service. The current service which will stay the same but move a little later in the morning. As part of this change they are creating three new worship teams and tonight's meeting was to officially announce the teams.
Each team with be made up of two units (for lack of a better word) - a band unit and a vocal unit of somewhere between 6 and 9 singers. They want each unit to be somewhat independent of each other to allow to people or entire units to sub for members who can't make a particular Sunday. One of the repercussions of this is all teams will have to have the same core songs and play them the same way. At this point in time it leaves a number of unanswered questions. Who decides the standard arrangement? How much room (if any at all) will there be for creative freedom? Are non-standard songs allowed to be developed by a team and kept specific to that team?
Those questions we've been wondering about since that big Tuesday night meeting. But now that the groups have been announced there are even more unanswered questions. I am the music leader for one of the teams, and I'm pretty happy on who I've been assigned on my team. There are a few that I don't know at all so I have no idea where they are at when it comes to leading worship. My band will pretty much stay the same so I'm pleased about that. Vocally it will be nice having Lesley and her mother, Julie, on my team. But now that my team has suddenly jumped from five people to twelve I'm definitely feeling overwhelmed. At the end of the meeting practice nights were decided upon based on the people that were there. For my vocalists, Thursday night is the best night for them to practice, but I know for a fact that Ian by bass player can't make it on Thursdays. And well I really don't know what my drummer's schedule is like since he's new to my team as well, but I know this morning he said he preferred Tuesday. So now I'm feeling pulled between the two units because I'm not sure if my band will be able to practice with my vocalists. Since I've been involved in worship at All Nations, having committed band members has been an issue. Filling the bass player spot has always been the hardest for some reason. It's barely been a month since my previous bass player left. The prospect of losing another one is not something I'm looking forward to.
So yeah.... why am I so upset about all this? After years with No Idols and being under Ron's leadership I finally had a band of my own. We were nice and independent and could do whatever songs we wanted in whatever style we wanted. Now it feels like I'm expected to fit into this mold and my first instinct is to resist it and to fight it. When I first signed up to help out with worship two summers ago at this church I made a conscious decision to start small because everything All Nations does is big. And at this very moment "Lord You Have My Heart" by Delirious? just popped up on my play list - a very "small", but incredibly powerful song. Talk about a way to underscore how I feel right now.
Lord you have my heart
And I will search for Yours
Jesus take my life and lead me on
Lord you have my heart
And I will search for Yours
Let me be to You a sacrifice
And I will praise You Lord
And I will sing of love come down
And as You show Your face
We'll see Your glory here
Matthew.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home